Petition for Adoption

This week we finally felt progress towards the next step…

For weeks, our friends and family have been asking “what’s next?” and “how long until the adoption is official?”.  In January I thought we would make the March adoption date based on the information provided by his caseworkers and guardian, but then we went weeks with no contact from the adoption caseworker.

FYI, there are SO many people involved in these cases and all the people take quite a while to understand the roles and responsibilities but for those interested here’s a little brief information on at least the ones that I have encountered through my experience thus far:

Certification Caseworker (my caseworker):  I have an advocate that is specific to me and my household who helps me keep up with all my ongoing training requirements, certifications, etc.  Mine is AWESOME! She keeps me on track and she also is a fantastic advocate when the caseworkers for the children aren’t responding or meeting our needs.  She visits my home once a month (while I have placements) to check-in and verify all things are in order and I have what I need to support the needs of the children.  And she has to see where the child sleeps… to some it seems weird, but clearly some foster parent(s) in the past have not provided children with adequate conditions.

In-take Caseworker:  Each child(ren) has a temporary caseworker that “intakes” them into the system…. and if they end up in my home then this caseworker is the one who removes them from the parents’ care.  Honestly these are the caseworkers that I have had the biggest issue with thus far due to the lack of communication and courtesy.  That said, I also realize that is takes a certain personality to be able to have the strength to pull a child out of a parent’s crying arms and know that I need to show them grace.  They have an incredibly tough job…. one I don’t know that I could do.  These caseworkers are usually only involved for about two weeks in my experience, which unfortunately is also typically the roughest for all parties due to the changes and trauma associated.

Ongoing Caseworker:  Each child(ren) has an ongoing caseworker who takes over for the intake caseworker after the case has moved to a foster home situation.  These caseworkers also see the child/visit the home once a month (ie. if I see them in court with the child then they don’t have to come to my home or daycare, but typically they come to the house once a month).  These caseworkers oversee the case for the child and ensure the needs of the child are met and manage the case with the biological parents.  Only Big L and Lil Baby G have had ongoing caseworkers since the first three were ultimately placed with kinship providers.  I have experienced much better communication and interactions with these caseworkers.  We also have a more extended relationship and more opportunity to connect.

Guardian at litem (GAL):  Each child(ren) has a court appointed individual (attorney) to represent their best interests.  I have truly enjoyed worked with each of the GALs for my children and I am amazed at how well they know these kids for the little amount of time they see and spend with them.  As a foster parent, I do not legally have the right to make decisions on behalf of the child’s best interest.  So if medical or educational decisions are needed, the GAL will provide guidance and serve as the child’s legal guardian until the parent’s regain guardianship or adoption.  The GAL or someone from their office usually comes to the house every other month (or sees me in court with them).

Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA):  Some children have a CASA…. in my experiences only Big L had a CASA.  As far as I understand this is an additional advocate for the child who is appointed by the courts and can visit the child and his caretakers (bio and foster) more often than all the caseworkers and GALs to ensure the needs of the child are being met and help provide more information to the court when recommendations are needed for the best interest of the child.  Big L’s CASA was very sweet and had a heart for that kind of work.  It seemed to be in addition to her day job, so it really seemed to be a position she was passionate about and she truly wanted to help these kids.

Adoption Caseworker: Once the child’s parental rights have been terminated and adoption is the next step for the child(ren), an adoption caseworker is assigned to negotiate the subsidy and terms of the adoption.  These caseworkers solely focus on adoption from what I understand.  For the organization that I work with, it is my understanding that there are only two which makes sense because reunification is the main goal of the agency and adoption is a last option.  Obviously, Lil Baby G is the only child that I have had the option of adopting so my experience is limited with this type.

Back to my update 🙂   Lil Baby G’s adoption caseworker finally reached out on Monday and she seems really on top of everything and clarified why things had been delayed.  She quickly sent me the paperwork to get things started with the adoption, including the Petition for Adoption.

THINGS JUST GOT REAL…. I realize we have been on this track towards adoption for quite a while, but there’s always a voice in my head that says don’t get your hopes too high.  While Lil Baby G’s case has been amazingly smooth since biological parents have not been involved throughout the process, I still always have this part of me that tries to protect my heart and reminds me that nothing is guaranteed.  So when I had to formally type out his soon-to-be legal name once he is adopted I just wept.  I called him by the name he will go by everyday, but never really write or say his full name since legally it’s something different.  Every doctor appointment or court case refers to him as “Boy”.  The reality is that this precious little man has issues with his birth certificate and no social security number…. I think it’s a miracle we get through medical appointments so smoothly with all the confusion surrounding his legal status (SO thankful for Children’s Hospital in that regard).  In just a matter of weeks/months, my little guy will FINALLY have a name legally!  I just can’t wait for that day for him.  My dad never expected to have our family name carried on by one of his grandson’s, but it looks like this little guy will carry on our family name.

So the next steps for us is filing the “Petition for Adoption” to start the legal process of adoption and negotiate the terms.  I am just learning as I go in this circumstance and reaching out to my foster/adoptive community for help when I have questions.   I am still hopeful that we will make the goal of the court to have him legally adopted by his first birthday!

We are also looking forward to celebrating his foster brother’s 2nd birthday next month… just short of a year from when I welcomed him into my home.  I am so grateful for my relationship with his family and being able to remain a part of Big L’s life.